You Can Now Eat Your Favorite Celebrities!

You Can Now Eat Your Favorite Celebrities!

JUNE 2, 2015  —  By Michelle Back  

Michelle Back

Staff Writer at First Slice!

EAT ME

The year is 2016. “I would like two slices of The Kanye, please.”

Do you love celebrities so much you wish you could eat them? Well now you can!

The future of meat has arrived! Just when you thought you had heard it all.

Meat makers at bitelabs.org are now trying to produce a type of artisanal salami that is mixed with celebrity and animal meat; I wasn’t joking when I said you could eat your favorite celebs — possible future candidates include James Franco, Jennifer Lawrence, Kanye West and Ellen DeGeneres! Sounds delicious.

Don’t hang around too long or you just might starve, in order for it to be completely official the celebs must agree to give up some tissue samples, or myosatellite cells as they call it.

On the bright side, bitelabs.org claims to be Eco-Friendly and good for your health…

Bite Labs’ meats are not affected by the growth hormones administered to farm animals, nor are they in contact with pesticides or other chemicals associated with industrial farming. The nutritional content of our products can be rigorously controlled. Farms are dirty, and animals prone to infection; Bite Labs is a clean space where we can grow safer, healthier products.”

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s